SATELLITE Freeview Lite choiceFilm London Lite Monday, 21 September 2009 29 skypremiere skycomedy skyaction/thriLLer skyFamiLy skydrama skysci-Fi/horror skyscreen1/hd skyscreen2/hd tcm FiLm4 skyindie 6.30 Disaster Movie. Spoof comedy, starring Matt Lanter and Vanessa Minnillo. The Accidental Husband. A talk-show host discovers she is married to a man she has never even met. Romantic comedy, starring Uma Thurman and Colin Firth. 9.40 Bangkok Dangerous. A hitman travels to Thailand to murder four people, but falls for a deaf girl. Action thriller, starring Nicolas Cage and Shahkrit Yamnarm. 11.25 Outpost. Horror, starring Ray Stevenson. 6.15 Dan In Real Life. A man falls for a woman he meets by chance. With Steve Carell. Balls Of Fury. The FBI recruit a washed-up ping-pong champion to infiltrate a tournament run by a criminal mastermind. With Dan Fogler. 9.35 St Trinians. Mischievous schoolgirls hatch a daring plan to save their boarding school from closure. With Rupert Everett, Colin Firth and Gemma Arterton. 11.20 Harold And Kumar Escape From Guantanamo Bay 6.00 Jaws 2. A man-eating shark terrorises teenagers adrift. With Roy Scheider. The Net. A shy computer analyst discovers evidence of a criminal conspiracy, so the bad guys decide to retaliate. With Sandra Bullock, Jeremy Northam, Dennis Miller and Diane Baker. Rambo. The one-man army travels to Burma to rescue a party of missionaries from a military officer. With Sylvester Stallone and Julie Benz. 11.35 The Generals Daughter 5.20 The Chronicles Of Narnia: Prince Caspian. Fantasy adventure sequel, with Ben Barnes. Wild Child. A spoiled teenager is sent to boarding school in the hope it will teach her discipline. Comedy, with Emma Roberts and Natasha Richardson. 9.45 Casper. The daughter of a paranormal expert befriends the amiable ghost of a young boy. Family comedy, starring Christina Ricci and Malachi Pearson. Spiceworld: The Movie. Musical comedy. 6.00 The Bone Collector. With Denzel Washington and Angelina Jolie. Stop-Loss. A disillusioned soldier returns home after a tour of duty in Iraq, haunted by the deaths of three of his fellow soldiers and hoping to pick up his life where he left off. With Ryan Phillippe. The Assassination Of Jesse James By The Coward Robert Ford. A young recruit joins the notorious outlaw and his gang, only to ultimately betray and murder him. With Brad Pitt and Casey Affleck. 6.45 What Lies Beneath. A doctors wife recovering from a car accident is troubled by visions of a ghostly girl who seems to be asking for help from beyond the grave. With Michelle Pfeiffer. Star Wars: The Clone Wars. Jedi knight Anakin Skywalker embarks on a rescue mission. With the voices of Matt Lanter, Christopher Lee and Samuel L Jackson. 10.45 The Ruins. Tourists exploring Mayan ruins are attacked by hostile villagers. With Jena Malone and Shawn Ashmore. 6.15 Step Up 2: The Streets. Drama, starring Briana Evigan and Robert Hoffman. The Game Plan. An American football stars carefree existence is transformed when he learns he has a daughter. Family comedy, starring Dwayne Johnson, Madison Pettis and Kyra Sedgwick. Indiana Jones And The Kingdom Of The Crystal Skull. The globe-trotting archaeologist races against the Soviets to find a powerful artefact. Action adventure, starring Harrison Ford. 6.50 The Mexican. A petty crook finds himself in a very tricky situation when he tries to smuggle a cursed gun from Mexico into America for his Mob boss. Comedy thriller, starring Brad Pitt. Spider-Man 3. The webslinging hero becomes consumed with a desire for revenge as he faces his uncles murderer, transformed into the shape-shifting Sandman. Superhero sequel, starring Tobey Maguire and Kirsten Dunst. 11.25 Halloween. Horror, with Malcolm McDowell. 6.45 Bronco Billy. A modern-day cowboys Wild West show is thrown into confusion by the arrival of a spoiled heiress. Comedy Western, with Clint Eastwood, Sondra Locke and Scatman Crothers. In Love And War. Fact-based romantic drama about Ernest Hemingways time as a soldier during the First World War. Chris ODonnell, Sandra Bullock, MacKenzie Astin and Ingrid Lacey star. 11.10 Quick Change. Comedy, starring Bill Murray and Geena Davis. 6.55 One Fine Day. Two mismatched single professionals babysit each others children during a hectic work day. Romantic comedy, starring George Clooney and Michelle Pfeiffer. Persepolis. A girl who spent her early years in Tehran during the Iranian revolution is sent away to Austria. Animated drama, with the voice of Chiara Mastroianni. 10.50 Basic Instinct 2. A seductive woman plays mind games on a psychologist. Thriller, with Sharon Stone. 6.35 Plunkett And Macleane. Two highwaymen make a profit robbing the rich. Period adventure, with Robert Carlyle. 8.20 The Fox And The Child. A little girl living in the mountains becomes fascinated by a wild fox living in the woods. Drama, with Bertille Nol-Bruneau. The Edge Of Heaven. A man travels from Germany to Turkey to find the daughter of his fathers dead lover. Turkish drama, starring Nurgul Yesilcay, Baki Davrak and Tuncel Kurtiz. movies 7.00Pm 7.30Pm 8.00Pm 8.30Pm 9.00Pm 9.30Pm 10.00Pm 10.30Pm 11.00Pm 11.30Pm cobie smulders, 7.30pm, e4 Joanna page, 9pm, BBc3 Gordon ramsay, 9pm, itV2 ian Wright, 10pm, sky1 anthony Lapaglia, 10pm, more4 prunellascales,10.20pm,G.o.L.d. skysports1 skysports2 skysports3 skysportsxtra eurosport espn Netbusters. The Football League. Live Irish Football. Cliftonville v Linfield (kick-off 7.45pm). All the action from the Premiership match at Solitude, as the sides battle it out for three points and local pride in the Belfast derby. Time Of Our Lives. Former Everton players discuss their success in the Eighties. Netbusters. The Football League. SPL Round-Up Extra Time Live Speedway. Nigel Pearson and Kelvin Tatum present coverage of another top meeting from the Elite League, in which Poole Pirates took the honours last season. History Of The ICC Champions Trophy. A look back at the highlights of the one-day tournament, which has been staged on three occasions, with the 2009 event getting under way this week. Speedway. An Elite League meeting. History Of The ICC Champions Trophy. A look back at the highlights of the one-day tournament, which has been staged on three occasions, with the 2009 event getting under way this week. Angling. Highlights of the first semi-final of the British Carp Angling Championship. WWE: Late Night -- Bottom Line. Jack Korpela presents highlights of the latest edition of Raw. WWE: Late Night -- Afterburn. Featuring the stars of Smackdown. Josh Mathews presents. NFL Gameday. A round-up of the latest American football news and results and a look ahead to forthcoming matches. NASCAR. The Sylvania 300. The Sprint Cup Series reached the 27th round, as the drivers battled it out at the New Hampshire Motor Speedway in Loudon. Poker. The Bay 101 Shooting Star. Highlights of the World Poker Tour event from San Jose in California. 6.15 Strongest Man 7.15 World Touring Car Championship. From the Autodromo Enzo e Dino Ferrari. 8.15 GP2 Series. Highlights of both races at the final meeting of the season. 9.15 Formula Two Championship. Highlights of both races at the meeting from Imola. 10.15 World Superbikes. Action from both races in round 11 at the Nrburgring in Germany. 11.45 Eurogoals Monday Night Review. Kelly Cates and Mark Chapman introduce a weekly round-up of Premier League and SPL. 8.15 Bundesliga Review Show. A look back at the latest round of fixtures in Germanys elite league. French Rugby. Highlights. Ultimate Fighting Championship. Action from UFC 103, featuring Rich Franklin v Vitor Belfort at the American Airlines Centre in Dallas. entertainment channels 7.00Pm 7.30Pm 8.00Pm 8.30Pm 9.00Pm 9.30Pm 10.00Pm 10.30Pm 11.00Pm 11.30Pm discoVery nat.GeoGraphic history yesterday Bio BLiGhty eden sky1 VirGin1 BBc3 BBc4 itV2 itV3 itV4 e4 more4 LiVinG G.o.L.d. aLiBi comedycentraL Fx sci-Fi The Simpsons. Bart wins an elephant. The Simpsons. Homer is cursed by a gypsy. Futurama. Fry goes undercover. The Simpsons. Lisa changes her image. UK Border Force. The UK Border Agency travel the country to put a stop to sham weddings. Football Behind Bars. Ian Wright works with inmates at Portland Young Offenders Institution. Ross Kemp In Search Of Pirates. The actor investigates piracy in Southeast Asia. Star Trek: Voyager. The ship is sucked into a cosmic void. Drama, starring Kate Mulgrew. Nothing To Declare. Documentary. Nothing To Declare Moonlight. Mick meets a woman who bears a strange resemblance to Coralline. Chuck. Sarah must seduce a handsome agent to gain information about Fulcrum. Sexcetera. Aspects of human sexuality, from the erotic to the downright bizarre. Doctor Who. David Tennant stars. 7.45 Doctor Who Confidential Bizarre ER. Narrated by Freema Agyeman. Clever V Stupid. With Matt Edmondson. Gavin And Stacey. Mathew Horne stars. Lunch Monkeys. Nigel Havers stars. EastEnders. Danniella Westbrook stars. Coming Of Age. Comedy drama. Family Guy 11.20 Family Guy 11.50 Clever V Stupid World News Today Cambridge Folk Festival 2009 Mr And Mrs Mackintosh. The relationship between Charles Rennie Mackintosh and his wife. The Glencoe Massacre. The slaughter of the MacDonald clan. John Michie narrates. What Darwin Didnt Know. Exploring the scientific progress that has been made since Charles Darwins theory of evolution by natural selection. The Dark Heart Of Italy. Documentary. Primeval. An anomaly opens underwater, dragging a teenage boy into a drain. The Cube. An electrical control engineer competes. Presented by Phillip Schofield. Hells Kitchen USA. Gordon Ramsay challenges the teams to prepare an Asian fusion menu. Hells Kitchen USA. The contestants cater for a bar mitzvah in New Yorks Hells Kitchen. Katy Brands Big Ass Show Coronation Street. Luke avoids Rosie. 6.55 Wycliffe. A famous novelist claims his life is in danger. Drama, guest starring Bill Nighy. Jeeves And Wooster. Berties Aunt Agatha asks him to retrieve a pawned necklace. Forensic Casebook With Matthew Kelly 9.35 Forensic Casebook With Matthew Kelly Taggart. Two long-dead bodies are found in a disused coal mine. Drama, starring Alex Norton. The Bill. Part one of two. A drugs raid draws a blank. Kelly Harrison guest stars. 6.05 The Sweeney 7.05 Andromeda. Dylan becomes trapped between dimensions. Magics Biggest Secrets Finally Revealed. How illusionists perform baffling tricks. Cops With Cameras. Officers unearth a stash of dangerous weapons. Last in the series. Enter The Dragon. A secret agent enters a no-holds-barred kung fu contest in a bid to infiltrate a drugs ring. Martial arts thriller, starring Bruce Lee, John Saxon, Kien Shih and Jim Kelly. Hollyoaks. A detective visits Eliots flat. How I Met Your Mother. Cobie Smulders stars. Friends. Ross tries a spray-on tan. Friends. Emmas first birthday arrives. One Tree Hill. Brooke is shocked to discover Samantha in her room with a boy. Shameless. Paddy resolves to banish his demons and regain control. Sean Gilder stars. Last in the series. 11.15 Scrubs. Brendan Fraser guest stars. 11.45 Scrubs Relocation, Relocation. A Bristol couple hope to move to London due to work commitments. More4 News. Alex Thomson presents. The Daily Show Global Edition Come Dine With Me. Four amateur cooks take it in turns to host dinner parties in Huddersfield. Without A Trace. A secret service agents teenage son disappears. Anthony LaPaglia stars. The Closer. Brenda and Fritz argue over who should take control of a case. Ghost Whisperer. Melinda is faced with a puzzling case. Drama, with Jennifer Love Hewitt. Make Me A Supermodel US. The would-be models travel to New York. Americas Next Top Model. The 13 finalists move into the New York loft apartment. Meet The Hasselhoffs. The actor and singer spends a summer in the UK. CSI: Crime Scene Investigation. Drama, starring William Petersen and Marg Helgenberger. Last Of The Summer Wine. Foggy tries to cheer Compo up. 7.40 Steptoe And Son. Harold gives ballroom dancing a whirl. 8.20 Yes Minister. Hacker hatches a cost-cutting plan. Only Fools And Horses. Del enters the car trade. 9.40 Only Fools And Horses. Del discovers a valuable statue. 10.20 Fawlty Towers. Basil tries to upgrade his clientele. Fawlty Towers. Comedy, starring John Cleese. 11.35 The Black Adder Maisie Raine. The owner of Maisies local off- licence is stabbed during a bungled robbery. Taggart. A body is found in a Clydeside shipyard. Drama, starring Blythe Duff and Alex Norton. New Tricks. A dog is found killed in a manner that matches a series of animal slayings from 30 years ago. 10.20 Maisie Raine. The DI investigates a stabbing. Pauline Quirke stars. 11.15 Taggart. A body is found in a Clydeside shipyard. The King Of Queens. Kevin James stars. The King Of Queens. Leah Remini stars. Scrubs. JD receives an unusual proposal. Scrubs. Comedy, guest starring Richard Kind. Two And A Half Men. Charlie Sheen stars. Two And A Half Men. Jon Cryer stars. Rules Of Engagement Sex And The City. Sarah Jessica Parker stars. 11.05 Sex And The City. Kim Cattrall stars. 11.40 Two And A Half Men Burn Notice. Part two of two. Michael helps a man accused of stealing art. NCIS. Ducky asks Abby to run a series of mysterious blood tests. Family Guy. Stewies first birthday arrives. American Dad! Stans confidence plummets. NCIS. Part two of two. Tony fears that Ziva may not be loyal to the team. The Wire. Colvin gives his men licence to force drug dealers out to the free zone. Knight Rider. A woman from Mikes past kidnaps his latest charge. Val Kilmer stars. Warehouse 13. Pete and Myka pursue a team of bank robbers who use a song as their weapon. Resident Evil: Apocalypse. A zombie fighter battles through hordes of the living dead in search of a scientist. Sci-fi horror sequel, starring Milla Jovovich and Sienna Guillory. My Name Is Bruce. A movie star is kidnapped by a fan. Horror, with Bruce Campbell. Mythbusters. Adam Savage and Jamie Hyneman try to shoot fish in a barrel. How Do They Do It? How Its Made. Thermometers. Mythbusters. Adam Savage and Jamie Hyneman test the strength of duct tape. American Chopper. Paul Teutul Snr tries to make up with his son Paul Jnr. Chop Shop. The conversion of the Ford Capri into a muscle car is finished. Seconds From Disaster. The chain of events that led to the destruction of the USS Forrestal. Crash Of The Century. Following events in March 1977, when two planes collided on a runway. Richard Hammonds Engineering Connections. The construction of HMS Illustrious. Britains Greatest Machines. Chris Barrie explores the technology of the Sixties. Americas Hardest Prisons. A tour of Ohios Lebanon Correctional Institute. Battles BC. How Moses led the Hebrew slaves out of Egypt and across the Red Sea. Britain AD: King Arthurs Britain. Francis Pryor examines the history of Britain. Ancient Plastic Surgery. Plastic surgeon Natasha Hidvegi investigates the origins of her profession and discovers people have been undergoing surgical enhancement for more than 2,000 years. Battles BC. How Moses led the Hebrew slaves out of Egypt and across the Red Sea. Antiques Roadshow. Michael Aspel and Lars Tharp return to Dunrobin Castle in Scotland. Inventions That Changed The World. Examining the influence of the jet engine. Victorian Farm. The team prepares to bring in the wheat harvest. Their Finest Hour. The emergency services during the Second World War. Antiques Roadshow. Michael Aspel and Lars Tharp return to Dunrobin Castle in Scotland. The Simple Life. Documentary. The Simple Life Crimes That Shook Britain. The events that led to the murders of Lin and Megan Russell. Chain Gang Girls. A series following the lives of Americas all-female chain gangs. Snapped: Women Who Kill. Documentary. Crimes Of Passion Women Behind Bars. The story of Patricia Johnson, who murdered her third husband. The Queens Castle. A tour of Windsors grounds with the Duke of Edinburgh. Heir Hunters. The heir hunters compete to find a surviving relative of Leonora Smith. Coast. Geographer Nicholas Crane travels to Berwick, along Englands north-east coast. Who Do You Think You Are? Actor David Tennant sets out to trace his Scottish roots. Traffic Cops. Stopping motorcyclists breaking the law. Jamie Theakston narrates. Congo. A journey into Africas heart of darkness with the BaAka pygmies. Journeys Into The Ring Of Fire. Iain Stewart explores California. Equator. The story of equatorial Africa. In Search Of The Snow Gods. Documentary. Saving Planet Earth Around The World In 80 Treasures. Dan Cruickshank explores Uzbekistan, Iran and Syria. factual 7.00Pm 7.30Pm 8.00Pm 8.30Pm 9.00Pm 9.30Pm 10.00Pm 10.30Pm 11.00Pm 11.30Pm sPort 7.00Pm 7.30Pm 8.00Pm 8.30Pm 9.00Pm 9.30Pm 10.00Pm 10.30Pm 11.00Pm 11.30Pm index.html2.html3.html4.html5.html6.html7.html8.html9.html10.html11.html12.html13.html14.html15.html16.html17.html18.html19.html20.html21.html22.html23.html24.html25.html26.html27.html28.html29.html30.html31.html32.html33.html34.html35.html36.html37.html38.html39.html40.html41.html42.html43.html44.html45.html46.html47.html