TELEVISION Filmchoice FILM RATINGS excellent very good good average poor KEY (R)repeat (S)subtitles on text service STEPHEN MARR BBC2 ITV1 Channel 4 Five London Lite Friday, 28 August 2009 21 10.30 No Place Like Home? (S). 11.25 ITV News Headlines (S). 11.30 60 Minute Makeover (R,S). 12.30 For The Rest Of Your Life (S). 1.30 ITV Lunchtime News (S). 1.55 London News And Weather (S). 2.00 Good Bid Good Buy (R,S). A gothic- style house is secured at auction. 3.00 Daily Cooks Challenge (S). Merrilees Parker and John Burton Race cook for Linda Lusardi. Last in the series. 3.59 London Weather (S). 4.00 Heartbeat (R,S). A child goes missing. Last in the series. 5.00 Golden Balls (R,S). Game show, hosted by Jasper Carrott. 6.00 London Tonight (S); Weather. 6.30 ITV Evening News (S); Weather. 7.00 Emmerdale (S). Mark reveals he has arranged for Ryans job offer to be withdrawn, Aaron warns Chas to stay away from Carl, and Terry is surprised by Val and Pollards interest in the B&B. See Soap Box 7.30 UEFA Super Cup Live (S). Barcelona v Shakhtar Donetsk (kick-off 7.45pm). The match between the respective winners of the Champions League and last-ever UEFA Cup at the Stade Louis II in Monaco. Presented by Matt Smith, with guests Andy Townsend and Robbie Earle. Commentary by Peter Drury and Jim Beglin. Subsequent programmes subject to change. See Ben Felsenburg 10.00 News At Ten And Weather (S). 10.30 London News And Weather (S). 10.35 TVs Naughtiest Blunders (R,S). Neil Morrissey narrates another batch of uncensored slip- ups, featuring Phillip Schofield, Fern Britton, Cat Deeley, Melanie Sykes, Yvette Fielding, Martin Clunes, Peter Davison and Dennis Waterman. 11.30 UEFA Super Cup Highlights. Barcelona v Shakhtar Donetsk. Matt Smith introduces action from the match between the respective winners of the Champions League and last-ever UEFA Cup at the Stade Louis II in Monaco. 12.30 Film: Robbery (S) (1967). Drama, starring Stanley Baker ; ITV News Headlines. 2.25 Film: Around The Bend (S) (2004). Drama, starring Michaelstarring MichaelMichael Caine. 3.45 ITV Nightscreen. 5.30 ITV Morning News (S). Cat Deeley 10.35pm, TVs Naughtiest Blunders 11.00 The Flintstones (R,S). 11.25 The Flintstones (R,S). 11.50 Film: Whispers: An Elephants Tale (S) (2000). Wildlife drama, with the voice of Angela Bassett. 1.00 Live Show Jumping (S). Coverage from the fourth day of the European Show Jumping and Dressage Championships, staged at Windsor Castle. 4.00 Flog It! (S). Paul Martin, Philip Serrell and Kate Bliss visit Wrexham. 4.30 Pointless (S). Quiz show, hosted by Alexander Armstrong. 5.15 The Hairy Bikers Food Tour Of Britain (S). The duo visit Shropshire. 6.00 Eggheads (R,S). Quiz show, hosted by Dermot Murnaghan. 6.30 Trust Me, Im A Dealer (S). Paul Martin tries to turn the savings of a single-mother of three daughters into a sum large enough to fund a trip to Australia -- her first holiday for 18 years. 7.00 Mud, Sweat And Tractors: The Story Of Agriculture (S). 4/4. The documentary examining British food production during the 20th century looks at how the Hereford and Aberdeen Angus breeds of cattle have evolved over the years, since the nation earned the reputation of The Stockyard of the World before the Second World War. Last in the series. 8.00 Mastermind (S). 1/31. New series. John Humphrys returns with the general knowledge quiz, with subjects including the life and works of Louis Wain and the Sherlock Holmes films of Basil Rathbone. 8.30 Gardeners World (S,HD). 15/23. Toby Buckland reveals his completed coastal garden, before Joe Swift joins him to build a seat inspired by sea-washed pebbles. 9.00 The Tudors (S,HD). 3&4/8. Double bill. As Christmas approaches, Henry is reunited with his daughters Mary and Elizabeth. When the king fails to reconcile his differences with the leaders of the rebellion, Brandon is shocked by the cruel measures taken to suppress the uprising, and the kings joy at the birth of his son is cut short by tragedy. See Ben Felsenburg 10.30 Newsnight (S). Analysis of the days events, presented by Emily Maitlis. Followed by Weather. 11.05 Ive Never Seen Star Wars (S). Marcus Brigstocke invites John Humphrys to try five cultural experiences that he has avoided. 11.35 Medium (R,S). 10/22. Allison is haunted by terrifying visions of a boys doll, which seems to have forced its owner to kill, while Joe worries about his health. 12.20 Medium (R,S). Texas Ranger Kenneth Push experiences visions. 1.00 The Wire (R,S). 2.00 The Wire (R,S). 2.55 The Wire (R,S). 3.55 Close. Toby Buckland 8.30pm, Gardeners World 10.10 Shipwrecked 2009: Battle Of The Islands (R,S). 11.45 N-Dubzs Postcard From T4 On The Beach (R,S). 12.00 News At Noon (S). 12.30 10 Years Younger: The Challenge (R,S). 1.25 Film: Please Sir! (S) (1971). Comedy, starring John Alderton. 3.25 Countdown (S). Word game with Alastair Stewart. 4.10 Deal Or No Deal (S). Game show, with Noel Edmonds. 5.00 Wogans Perfect Recall (R,S). Memory and general knowledge competition. 5.30 Come Dine With Me (S,HD). More arguments threaten the final meal in Swansea. 6.00 The Simpsons (R,S). 17/23. Homer and Bart set off on a journey to deliver a dead lorry drivers cargo. 6.30 Hollyoaks (S,HD). Tony and Cindy struggle to communicate with each other, while Zo has an attack of conscience over her racy footage of underage Theresa. 7.00 News (S). 7.30 How To Snare A Millionaire (S). Documentary following 28-year- old Rebecca Arnold, who has never had a long-term relationship and is determined to find a man -- and a rich one at that. She transforms herself into a glamourpuss and visits an up-market nightclub, and meets a sugar daddy old enough to be her father. See Ben Felsenburg 8.00 A Place In The Sun: Home Or USA? (R,S,HD). 1/10. Former Watford FC footballer Damien Francis and his model fiance Rachel Ritfeld compare properties in London and Los Angeles. With a 1m budget, the couple must weigh a glamorous lifestyle against the possibility of Damien missing his mother. Jonnie Irwin and Jasmine Harman present. 9.00 Big Brother (S). Davina McCall counts down to this weeks eviction, a battle of the alpha males between Marcus and Siavash, in which the dark horse goes up against the clothes horse. Plus, a round-up of action from the past 24 hours. 10.00 The Kevin Bishop Show (S). 5/6. The fast-paced sketch show continues with more spoofs from the world of television, film and popular culture at breakneck speed. 10.35 Big Brother (S). Davina McCall and two guests talk to the latest evictee -- either Marcus or Siavash -- who discusses life before the cameras and the prospects for the contestants in next Fridays final. 11.05 The Simpsons (R,S). 14/22. Krusty gets elected to Congress. 11.35 8 Out Of 10 Cats (R,S). Panel show in which two teams answer questions based on opinion polls. 12.05 4Music: Mika -- Through The Looking Glass (S). The singer performs. 12.40 4Music: 4Play: Julian Perretta (S). Profile of the singer-songwriter. 1.00 Big Brother Live. 4.00 Post Modern Pastimes (R,S). 4.15 FIVB Beach Volleyball (S). 5.10 Countdown (R,S). With Alastair Stewart. 5.55 Sali Mali (S). Jonnie Irwin 8pm,APlaceInTheSun:HomeOrUSA? 10.45 Trisha Goddard (R,S). 11.45 Michaelas Animal Road Trip (R,S). 12.40 Five News (S). 12.50 Medical Investigation (R,S). Part two of two. The cure to the epidemic is stolen. Last in the series. 1.45 Neighbours (S). Susan and Libby face criticism for the surrogacy. 2.15 Lemur Island (R,S). The Tornado family faces a crisis. 3.05 Zoo Days Shorts (R,S). Brief highlights from the series. 3.10 Film: Ladies Of The House (S) (2008). Premiere. Drama, with Pam Grier and Florence Henderson. 5.00 Five News (S). 5.30 Neighbours (R,S). 6.00 Michaelas Animal Road Trip (S). 19/20. Michaela Strachan tours Britains most dedicated animal carers, visiting Trotters World of Animals in the Lake District, where staff are eagerly awaiting the birth of three Canadian lynx cubs. 7.00 Five News At 7 (S). 7.30 Top Trumps: Helicopters (R,S). Robert Llewellyn travels to Cornwall to collect statistics on the A109 chopper, the worlds fastest civilian helicopter originally developed for search and rescue but now often used for aerial filming. Meanwhile, Ashley Hames heads to Alabama to learn about the AH-64 Apache. Followed by Five News Update. 8.00 Youre Nicked! (S). Natalie Pinkham joins police on the Irish border, where the consequences of drink-driving are revealed. In Britain, she witnesses a police chase in the Midlands that requires helicopter support, a case in London prompted by a wifes report that her husband is missing, and an ex-convict wielding a chainsaw in a town centre. Followed by Five News At 9. 9.00 NCIS (R,S). 15/24. A sailors body is discovered in a disused restaurant, and death is initially ascribed to an accidental drug overdose -- until Abby discovers a message written in blood on a laminated card found at the scene, and realises he was murdered. Meanwhile, Jimmy continues to pursue a relationship with Agent Michelle Lee. Pauley Perrette stars. 10.00 Law And Order: Criminal Intent (S). 15/22. The members of an evangelical church close ranks to protect their leader, an influential preacher whose wife has been found dead. As Goren struggles to find her killer, he is distracted by fears over his mothers worsening health -- and an encounter with his estranged brother. Guest starring Tom Arnold. 11.00 CSI: Miami (R,S). 9/25. Horatio clashes with a disgraced cop whose sense of grievance is jeopardising inquiries into the murders of two women who were somehow electrocuted -- seemingly with jump-leads. David Caruso stars. 12.00 Quiz Call. Interactive game show. 4.00 The FBI Files (R,S). The work of the Bureaus crime laboratory. 4.45 Wildlife SOS (R,S). The work of volunteers at an animal sanctuary. 5.10 Neighbours (R,S). 5.35 HouseBusters (R,S). Natalie Pinkham 8pm, Youre Nicked! The Bourne Supremacy ITV2, 9pm (2004) MATT DAMON, above, returns as the assassin whose memory is as bad as his attitude. His bid to live a quiet life is blown when his lover is killed and he is framed for a botched CIA operation. Deciding to simultaneously clear his name and get his revenge, Bourne dusts off the old killer instinct and starts a one-man bullet-fest. Also stars Julia Stiles. Dirty Dancing Fiver, 9pm (1987) SPENDING the summer in a holiday camp, a young girl falls in love with the camps dancing instructor. Its hard to imagine that such a simple idea would blossom into one of the best-loved movies of all time. A lot of its success has to do with the chemistry between stars Jennifer Grey and Patrick Swayze, above. But the soundtracks pretty good as well. Napoleon Dynamite Film4, 7pm (2004) JON HEDER, above, stars as Napoleon Dynamite -- a slack-jawed teenager who tries to help a new-found friend win the class presidency at their backwater school. Heder is such a convincing oddball that it was surprising to see him behaving normally during promotional interviews. A mind-altering comedy for adventurous film lovers. The Shadow ITV4, 12.20am (1994) HERES proof that not every comic-book character translates successfully from the page to the big screen. Its a pity this film didnt do any better at the box office, because The Shadow could have made a fine franchise. A heavily stylised Thirties backdrop provides director Russell Mulcahy with some awesome sets -- and star Alec Baldwin, above, with some fine wardrobe choices. index.html2.html3.html4.html5.html6.html7.html8.html9.html10.html11.html12.html13.html14.html15.html16.html17.html18.html19.html20.html21.html22.html23.html24.html25.html26.html27.html28.html29.html30.html31.html32.html33.html34.html35.html36.html37.html38.html39.html