London Lite Thursday, 20 August 2009 21 The Mummy Returns ITV2, 9pm (2001) Pharaohs, curses, gunplay and creepy- crawlies abound in this action adventure. Nevertheless, if I was Brendan Fraser, Id sack my agent. hes quite a good actor, and yet hes forever stuck doing schlock adventure films like this one. Then again, he does get the opportunity to get his paws on rachel Weisz, above, so there might be method in the boys madness. Into The Blue Fiver, 8pm (2005) oN ThE face of it, this film would appear to be little more than a vehicle for getting Jessica alba, above, into as little clothing as possible... why do I say that like its a bad thing? But it turns out to be a mildly compelling story about scuba divers who fall foul of the local drug dealer when they stumble (well, swim) upon a plane full of his wares. also stars Paul Walker. Wolf Creek Film4, 1.30am (2005) oKaY, 1.30am is technically tomorrow but its worth waiting up for if you like getting the bejesus scared out of you. Three backpackers set off on an australian outback odyssey and everything seems fine until they meet an oddball local. If you can get past the aussie slang, Wolf Creek is a basic but very effective horror film. stars Kestie Morassi, above. Maximum Risk Five USA, 9pm (1996) a FrENCh cop comes to New York to avenge the death of his long-lost brother. of all the high-kicking action heroes still alive, I think I like Jean-Claude Van Damme, above, the best. however, this film should have been called Maximum repetition. The action scenes soon become formulaic; the car chases look familiar -- and Im sure JCVD fights the same guy three times! 10.30 No Place Like home? (s). 11.25 ITV News headlines (s). 11.30 60 Minute Makeover (r,s). 12.30 For The rest of Your Life (r,s). 1.30 ITV Lunchtime News (s). 1.55 London News and Weather (s). 2.00 Good Bid Good Buy (s). 3.00 Daily Cooks Challenge (s). 3.59 London Weather (s). 4.00 heartbeat (r,s). steve comes to the aid of an amnesiac struggling to piece together his identity, while Bernie and David step in when Vernons money-making schemes get out of hand. 5.00 Golden Balls (s). Game show, hosted by Jasper Carrott. 6.00 London Tonight (s); Weather. 6.30 ITV Evening News (s); Weather. 7.00 Emmerdale (s). John is pushed to the limit when he catches aaron setting light to strands of hay in one of the barns. Meanwhile, Diane and Pollard try to come to terms with Vals sudden departure. 7.30 Countrywise (s). 23/36. Paul heiney watches ospreys when he travels to rutland Water for the British Bird Fair. he also joins in with the south London lavender harvest. 8.00 Emmerdale (s). John is arrested, Val is delighted to learn Pollard has reacted badly to her disappearance, and Bob accuses Gennie of leading Jamie on. 8.30 Coronation Street (s). steve tries to track down slug in the hope of proving he planted the drugs in the pub. Kevin and sally are disappointed by their house-hunting, and Davids jealousy of Jason grows. 9.00 The Bill (s,hD). Part two of two. When psychiatrist Julia Bickhams partner is injured in a hit-and-run incident and her nanny is attacked in what turns out to be a case of mistaken identity, Neil investigates the possibility somebody holds a grudge against her. among the suspects is a man whose wife died two years previously from an overdose. andrew Lancel stars. 10.00 News At Ten And Weather (s). 10.30 London News And Weather (s). 10.35 The 30 Year Secret: Real Crime (r,s). The story of stefan Kiszko, who spent 16 years in prison after being wrongly convicted of murder in 1975, revealing the impact of the miscarriage of justice on the victims family and Kiszko himself. 11.35 Surface (s). 5/15. Laura and rich reunite and track one of the sea creatures to a pier in California. Miles and Phil struggle to keep Nimrods existence a secret from animal control officers searching for a missing neighbourhood dog. 12.30 British superbike Championship highlights. action from the eighth round of the season at Brands hatch. 1.40 Motorsport UK (s); ITV News headlines. 2.30 supernatural (r,s). 3.20 ITV Nightscreen. 5.30 ITV Morning News (s). 9.45 Live World Championship athletics (s,hD). Coverage of day six from Berlin. 11.45 Castle In The Country (r,s). 12.15 open Gardens (r,s). 12.45 Film: a stitch In Time (s) (1963). Comedy, starring Norman Wisdom. 2.15 sun, sea and Bargain spotting (r,s). 3.00 Monk (r,s). 3.45 Flog It! (r,s). 4.45 Live World Championship athletics (s,hD). Further coverage of day six from the olympic stadium in Berlin, where medals are decided in the mens decathlon, 200m and 110m hurdles, plus the womens 400m hurdles and high jump. 6.00 Live World Championship Athletics (s,hD) continues. 8.00 Rick Steins Far Eastern Odyssey (s,hD). 6/6. The chef ends his exploration of the Far Easts most diverse food cultures by visiting Bangladesh, sampling the curry on offer in the country that has played a role in establishing the success of Indian restaurants throughout the UK. Last in the series. 9.00 Mock The Week (s). 7/13. Dara oBriain presents highlights and previously unseen material from the series so far, featuring panellists Frankie Boyle, hugh Dennis, russell howard and andy Parsons. 9.30 The Funny Side Of Animals (s). 3/6. Comedian and presenter Clive anderson takes a humorous look at televisions relationship with animals through the years. 10.30 Newsnight (s). analysis of the days events, presented by Gavin Esler. Followed by Weather. 11.20 The Wire (s). 1/10. New series. Carcetti struggles to keep his pre-election promises and is forced to choose increased funding for education over more money for the police. The cutbacks lead to the Major Crimes Unit being disbanded and a disillusioned McNulty is sent back to homicide. 12.20 Wine (s). The work of south african wine producers oupa rangaka and Mark solms. Last in the series. 1.20 BBC News (s). 4.10 Close. 10.55 shipwrecked 2009: Battle of The Islands (r,s). 12.00 News at Noon (s). 12.30 a Place By The sea (r,s). 1.25 Channel 4 racing From York (s). alastair Down presents todays four feature races from the third day of the Ebor meeting, featuring the 3.25 Darley Yorkshire oaks (1m 4f). 3.45 Jamie at home (r,s). Jamie oliver uses mushrooms to rustle up simple dishes. 4.10 Deal or No Deal: Noels hall of Fame (r,s). Noel Edmonds introduces a memorable episode. 5.00 Come Dine With Me (r,s,hD). Four dinner parties take place in Blackburn. 6.00 The Simpsons (r,s). 11/23. springfield Elementary is vandalised, prompting Chief Wiggum to enforce a curfew. 6.30 Hollyoaks (s,hD). Kris and Zak try to make money by running a fitness class, and Josh lies to his parents about his exam results. 7.00 News (s). 7.55 3 Minute Wonder: Microsoft Babies (s). 8/8. a software expert considers whether depression was the reason he nearly gave up on his family, or if it was due to him working too hard. Last in the series. 8.00 How Clean Is Your House? (s,hD). 2/12. Kim Woodburn and aggie MacKenzie visit Texan charity worker Melinda, whose filthy home has caused a rift between her and her grown-up daughter. 8.30 Dolce Vito -- Dream Restaurant (s). 2/6. Entrepreneur Vito Cataffo finds an eatery in his home town of Benevento to transform into a Tudor dining hall. 9.00 Benefit Busters (s). 1/3. New series. With Britain set to pay out more in benefits than it raises in income tax, the Government is trying to revolutionise the welfare system. This programme follows hayley Taylor as she runs a six-week course designed to help single mothers gain the skills and confidence needed to return to work. see Ben Felsenburg 10.00 Big Brother (s). highlights from the housemates past 24 hours inside the Big Brother compound. 11.10 The TNT Show (s). 11/12. Topical entertainment show, with Jack Whitehall and holly Walsh. 11.40 You Have Been Watching (r,s). 7/8. David Mitchell and Ben Miller take part in the comedy quiz. 12.30 4Music: 4Play: Passion Pit (s). Profile of the american electro quintet. 12.45 Big Brother Live. The latest action from the Big Brother house, as it happens. 4.00 Full Metal Challenge (r,s). 4.55 scrapheap Challenge (r,s). 5.50 The Treacle People (r,s). 10.45 Trisha Goddard (r,s). 11.45 house (r,s). 12.40 Five News (s). 12.50 Medical Investigation (r,s). 1.45 Neighbours (s). 2.15 Zoo Days (r,s). a life-or-death procedure takes place at the orang-utan house. 2.50 Property List: Top spots (r,s). highlights from the series exploring the nations best homes. 3.05 Zoo Days shorts (r,s). Brief highlights from the series. 3.15 Film: The staircase Murders (s) (2007). Premiere. Thriller, starring Treat Williams. 5.00 Five News With Natasha Kaplinsky (s). 5.30 Neighbours (r,s). 6.00 Michaelas Animal Road Trip (s). 14/20. at south Lakes Wild animal Park in Cumbria, Michaela strachan helps out in the preparations for the release of a family of south american flamingos, while park owner David Gill braces himself for a high-risk operation. 7.00 Five News At 7 (s). 7.15 Cricket On Five (s). England v australia. Mark Nicholas presents action from the opening day of the fifth and final Test of the series, held at the oval, where a strong start was imperative in this crucial match. England need a victory to regain the ashes after their humiliating defeat at headingley, with the series level at 1-1 heading into this match. 8.00 The Mentalist: Revealed (s). as the season finale of the drama airs tonight, this documentary celebrates its title character Patrick Jane and the actor who portrays him. see Ben Felsenburg 8.30 Inside The Mentalist (s). Behind the scenes of the crime drama, focusing on a day in the life of the cast and tours around the set. see Ben Felsenburg 9.00 The Mentalist (s). 22/23. a pupil at a high school for troubled youngsters is found beaten to death in a forest, and a map discovered in a dormitory leads Kimball and Wayne to a run-down shack. They find a man who has been targeted by a secretive gang of children, who are coerced into carrying out acts of vandalism by a mysterious leader. see Ben Felsenburg 10.00 The Mentalist (s). 23/23. a girl is stabbed to death, with her twin sister still missing and the crime bearing the hallmarks of red John. a love letter leads the team to a blind woman who is able to provide a rough description of the killer, prompting Patrick to put his life on the line in a bid to catch the man who murdered his family. Last in the series. see Ben Felsenburg 11.00 Law And Order: Criminal Intent (r,s). 22/23. Goren and Eames investigate the death of a man whose wife had been sleeping with a former police officer known to have close ties with Deakins. 12.00 Quiz Call. Interactive game show giving viewers the chance to phone in and answer questions for cash prizes. 4.00 NFL Classic (r). action from a memorable american football encounter. 4.45 Wildlife sos (r,s). 5.10 Neighbours (r,s). 5.35 house Doctor (r,s). TELEVISION Filmchoice FILM RATINGS excellent very good good average poor KEY (r)repeat (s)subtitles on text service STEPHEN MARR BBC2 ITV1 Channel 4 Five FOR 2GLASSES FROM 125 not be used with other offers. Second pair from the same range as the first pair or below and to the same prescription. 1.5 scratch-resistant varifocal, in your first pair. Extra Options available at an additional charge on both pairs. Ends 5 December 2009. 2009 Specsavers Optical Group. 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