This is Londons MESSAGEBOARDemail your views to or log on to 10 Friday, 24 July 2009 London Lite Just returned from holiday on which me and my brother squirted mustard off top of the Empire state Building and found where it landed when we got down! Colman, London suIts on the 6.12 to Braintree should consider themselves warned. Im bringing my sons water pistol next time and wont be afraid to use it in the event of any more pushing! Liv, CM77 sal (Txts, Wed): another psychic iPod moment. I was about to have operation under anaesthetic and Dont Fear the Reaper by Blue Oyster Cult came on surgeons iPod dock. Gulp! Denise, SW12 sal: wearing floaty skirt on windy day and nearly flashed all on london Bridge. iPod plays Fat Bottom Girls by Queen.... Cheek! Emma, Sutton sal: was in a car crash on the motorway, song that was playing -- live Forever by Oasis. Freaky!! Hannahb, Kent tOP tube tip -- put a dollop of shoe polish on your shoes and then allow them to rub along the escalator brushes as you descend! Polished, E17 saW a man dressed as a bear telling a hot girl he loved her using cards and flowers at Marble arch. she looked scared. Paw thing. Ian, N1 RIvERWatChER (txts, thurs): the surfer on the thames was riding a big one-off wave created by a tidal bore. theyre caused by the moon and this one was bigger because of the eclipse. Phil, Hitchin Why do tube trains jump as they pull away. Normally when Im not holding on! Lee, Herts FIGhtFaN (Txts, Thurs): if theres a film with a retired cop whose family has been killed, seagal is there. hes a hero! What can van Damme do? Dave, SS8 FIGhtFaN: neither would win because Chuck Norris has kicked both of them down into the ground. Dee, CM1 WIFE said she was going out for a quiet drink to cheer up her mate. Just seen the pics on Facebook and she was actually at her school reunion. Worth a row? LJP, EC4 I taKE it every office has at least one person who still tells you that their email address has no spaces? Dan, Barnet huRt (Txts, Thurs): man up, all girls complain about their boyfriends! stop the Facebook stalking. B, SE1 huRt: dumping her on Facebook would really give them something to moan about. Angie, EC4 MaRRIaGE dilemma. Princess dress and big party seemed like good idea at the time, six months later and not so sure. suggestions? Frustrated, Surrey Are the French overreacting to swine flu? THE sniping of Mitchell Johnsons mum about bitchy Wags being at the Ashes explains a lot. No wonder the Aussie superstar bowler, pictured with girlfriend Jessica Bratich, finds it hard to concentrate. Derek, London IF WE really want to win the Ashes we should forget about Wags distracting the Australian cricket players, as Johnsons mum Vikki Harber complains. Fly her over here without delay! Carl, London Id dITcH my mum to have a girlfriend as good-looking as the lovely model and karate champion Miss Bratich. Steve C, Dulwich aFtER reading about the horrendous acid honour killing attack (Lite, Thurs) I must reinforce that this has nothing to do with Islam. as the quote in the article said, this is a cultural thing usually belonging to Pakistan or asia. Ziggy, Ealing. FlIss (Letters, Thurs) is so small-minded. Well always remember stephen lawrence and Damilola taylor, both of whom where neither white nor middle-class. Sonia, EN4 Another thing Dotroopsgetenoughsupportaftertours?IsHirstsbikecoolorcruel? IsAshesmumrightaboutWags? Getitoff your txtYour mobile moans To be considered for publication, texts must be submitted with name and address or postcode. Please restrict messages to 25 WORDS. Thanks. >>Text TELLUS to 65800 followed by a space and your messageEach text costs 25p plus standard network charges >>Text LL TELLUS to 65400 Terms apply. See E VEN with seemingly extreme tactics, such as the detention of a class of 14-year-old British schoolchildren by medics in spaceman-style hazard suits, France will only delay the H1N1 pan- demic by a week or two. If French president Nicolas Sarkozy wants to dramatically increase his chances of avoiding the virus, I suggest he moves to North Korea for five years, where they really dont let anyone in or out! El Wisty, London FAIR enough that the French authorities want to be as careful as they can with suspected cases of swine flu. But, after detaining the kids in their chateau, by then transporting them out of the country I think they are increasing the viruss opportunities to spread. The youngsters should have been kept in quarantine, like the British schoolkids visiting China. Mark, south London PEOPLE are getting paranoid and its not just the French! What about the reported case of the Irish family who were put under guard at a Blackpool caravan park with suspected swine flu? The park management wouldnt allow them to leave their caravan until they agreed to go straight home! Jess, E11 AT LEAST the French take action. They have hardly any swine flu cases over there and also managed to avoid the worst of the foot and mouth outbreak. Statistics dont lie. The French can handle a crisis! Boris, W6 THE class should have stood up to them, then they would do what they always do -- surrender. Peter, Brixton IM FRENCH and I think Eurostar should terminate at Ashford for now, to protect my country. Debrajoan, London Textpoll Q: Should Brown quit before the election? OurlastresultShould exam watchdog be completely independent? YES 96% NO 4%*Texts charged at 50p plus your standard network rate. Terms and conditions apply. See Text LL POLL YES or LL POLL NO followed by your first name and postcode to 65400or at Lockdown: French docs wore hazard suits to hold kids on holiday? Dont miss a single edition! 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