TELEVISION Filmchoice FILM RATINGS excellent very good good average poor KEY (R)repeat (S)subtitles on text service STEPHEN MARR BBC2 ITV1 Channel 4 Five London Lite Monday, 13 July 2009 23 10.30 This Morning (S). James Morrison performs his latest single. 12.30 Loose Women (S). 1.30 ITV Lunchtime News (S). 1.55 London News And Weather (S). 2.00 Dickinsons Real Deal (R,S). From Evesham in Worcestershire. 3.00 Daily Cooks Challenge (S). 3.59 London Weather (S). 4.00 Midsomer Murders (R,S). Part two of two. As the beneficiaries continue to meet with inexplicable accidents, Barnaby hunts for the missing will. Rosemary Leach guest stars. 5.00 The Fuse (S). New series. Game show, hosted by Austin Healey. 6.00 London Tonight (S); Weather. 6.30 ITV Evening News (S); Weather. 7.00 Emmerdale (S). Bob shares a passionate moment with Gennie, Val encourages Pollard to get a job, and Debbie gains a potential admirer. 7.30 Coronation Street (S). Kevin tries to end his affair, encouraging Tyrone to book a holiday to take Mollys mind off him. John gives Fiz his grandmothers engagement ring, but she continues to withhold news of her problems with Chesney. 8.00 Airline (R,S). 11/20. A big freeze across Europe brings chaos to Luton airport the day before New Years Eve, and Leo Jones bears the brunt of passengers dissatisfaction. 8.30 Coronation Street (S). Tyrones holiday plans fail to kindle Mollys enthusiasm. Hayley refuses to join Fizs wedding preparations until she has informed Chesney, and money worries affect Ashleys mood. 9.00 Monday Monday (S). 1/7. New series. Comedy drama following Sally, PA to the Head of Human Resources of struggling supermarket chain Butterworths, as she copes with her employer relocating its head office to Leeds, the incompetence of her alcoholic boss and breaking up with her fianc. Morven Christie and Fay Ripley star. See Ben Felsenburg 10.00 News At Ten And Weather (S). 10.30 London News And Weather (S). 10.35 Ali G Indahouse (S,HD) (2002). Scheming politicians use the unwitting Ali G as a pawn in a plot to bring down the prime minister. Comedy, with Sacha Baron Cohen and Michael Gambon. See Film Choice 12.10 Nightwatch With Steve Scott: Mystery (R,S). Reopening the files and casebooks on some of Britains most notorious murders and infamous criminals, taking a new look at unsolved mysteries. 1.05 Tour De France 2009 (S). Gary Imlach presents a look back at the first nine stages of Le Tour, which began in Monaco and reached Tardes on Sunday; ITV News Headlines. 2.00 Loose Women (R). Topical debate. 2.45 The Jeremy Kyle Show (R,S). Guests air their differences. 3.40 ITV Nightscreen. Guide to ITV. 5.30 ITV Morning News (S). Leo Jones 8pm, Airline 10.35 Beat The Boss (R,S). 11.05 The Flintstones (R,S). 11.30 Castle In The Country (R,S). 12.00 Daily Politics (S). 12.30 Working Lunch (S). 1.00 Rowing (S). 2.00 Animal Park (R,S). Mating season begins for the wolves. 2.30 Car Booty (R,S). A woman raises money for her granddaughter. 3.00 Murder, She Wrote (R,S). Jessica attends a seminar in Australia. 3.45 Flog It! (R,S). From Bury St Edmunds, Suffolk. 4.30 Put Your Money Where Your Mouth Is (R,S). Lorne Spicer and Mark Franks compete. 5.15 Escape To The Country (R,S). 6.00 Eggheads (R,S). Quiz show, hosted by Dermot Murnaghan. 6.30 Bargain Hunt Famous Finds (S). 7/10. Comedian Julian Clary and actor Matt Cottle are joined by their mothers at the market town of Cirencester in Gloucestershire to search for valuable heirlooms. 7.00 Top Gear (R,S). 4/7. Richard Hammond and James May test the Porsche Panamera against the Royal Mails delivery service, racing a first- class letter to see which travels fastest over the full length of the British Isles. Jeremy Clarkson is on the receiving end of the British Armys latest weapons, and Olympic sprinter Usain Bolt is the Star in a Reasonably Priced Car. 8.00 University Challenge (S). 2/37. The Royal Veterinary College takes on Manchester University for a place in the second round. Jeremy Paxman asks the questions in the quiz. 8.30 What To Eat Now (S). 2/6. Chef Valentine Warner focuses on creating the perfect picnic, revealing his top five tips for eating outdoors and searching for the best ingredients to make a salad. 9.00 The Supersizers Eat (S). 4/6. The duo embark on a culinary journey through the Twenties, as Sue Perkins transforms into an It girl and Giles Coren dons full dandyish attire to drink cocktails at the Ritz, dance the Charleston at the Cafe de Paris and race Bentleys at Brooklands. They also sample a gourmet Fortnum & Mason picnic at the British Museum. 10.00 How Not To Live Your Life (S,HD). 1/6. New series. Comedy, written by and starring Dan Clark, charting the exploits of Don, a twentysomething neurotic singleton, as he tries and fails to navigate the basics of day-to-day life. See Ben Felsenburg 10.30 Newsnight (S). With Jeremy Paxman. Followed by Weather. 11.20 The Wire (S). 10/12. Colvin manages to put off a reporter inquiring about the free zones, but realises he has to report his policy to Burrell. When the units wiretaps go dead after just a few days, Freamon comes up with an ingenious solution and ropes Bubbles in to help. Avon refuses to accept Stringers advice to follow the co-ops proposal for a truce. Continues tomorrow. 12.20 BBC News (S). 3.45 Close. Valentine Warner 8.30pm, What To Eat Now 11.00 Desperate Housewives (R,S,HD). 12.00 News At Noon (S). 12.30 Life Begins Again (R,S). 1.25 Film: Doctor In Distress (S) (1963). Amorous medic Simon Sparrow plays Cupid for pompous chief surgeon Sir Lancelot Spratt. Comedy, with Dirk Bogarde and James Robertson Justice. 3.25 Countdown (S). With Ian Hyland. 4.15 Deal Or No Deal (S). Beat-the-banker game show. 5.00 Wogans Perfect Recall (S). 5.30 Come Dine With Me Extra Portions (S,HD). A farm owner hosts the first dinner party in Aberdeen. 6.00 The Simpsons (R,S). 5/22. Homer is filmed fleeing from a bear and becomes a local laughing stock. 6.30 Hollyoaks (S,HD). Natty hears that Ste has been sacked and heads to his flat -- only to be intercepted by Daniel along the way. Spencer helps Calvin with his money worries. 7.00 News (S). 7.55 3 Minute Wonder: The Estate (S). 1/16. New series. The Sighthill Estate in north Glasgow, built in the Sixties, was once home to 7,500 people, but the area is now rife with crime, drugs and poverty. Filmed over the course of a year, this documentary presents a portrait of a high-rise community being cleared for demolition. 8.00 Dispatches: The Children Britain Betrayed (S). Journalist Peter Oborne examines the alleged failures in Britains child protection system, presenting the results of a six-month investigation by Dispatches that reveals how many of the 160 child killings since 2004 could have been prevented. He meets some of the families affected by the murder of a child. 9.00 Inside Natures Giants (S,HD). 3/4. Mark Evans joins experts in anatomy, evolution and behaviour to find out how crocodiles digest large chunks of raw meat and bone. Although the creatures teeth are excellent for gripping prey, they are useless for chewing, so food is often swallowed whole. The team dissects the digestive system and inspects the stomach of one of the reptiles. 10.00 Big Brother (S). Continuing the week of celebrations and surprises to commemorate the shows 10th anniversary. Another former housemate returns to challenge a current inmate in a task from one of the 10 series. Plus, highlights of the past 24 hours. 11.10 Michael Jacksons Last Days: What Really Happened (R,S). Jacques Peretti examines the events leading up to the singers death. 12.10 4Music: Dead Weather: Video Exclusive (S). First showing of Treat Me Like Your Mother. 12.15 Green Day: Live From Abbey Road (R,S). The punk rock band perform at the famous studios. 12.50 PokerStars.com. 1.50 Big Brother Live. 4.00 Film: The Way We Were (S,HD) (1973). Drama, starring Robert Redford and Barbra Streisand. Peter Oborne 8pm, Dispatches... 10.45 Trisha Goddard (R,S). 11.45 House Doctor (R,S). 12.15 House Doctor (R,S). 12.45 Five News (S). 12.55 Wordplay (S). 1.45 Neighbours (S). Steph reads Toadies revised script. 2.15 Home And Away (S). 2.50 Wordplay Plus (S). Viewers take part in the daily quiz show. 3.10 Zoo Days Shorts. Brief highlights from the series. 3.15 Film: Wild Hearts (S) (2006). A widowed police detective struggles with the change in lifestyle when he inherits a ranch in Montana. Drama, starring Richard Thomas. 5.00 Five News (S). 5.30 Neighbours (R,S). 6.00 Home And Away (R,S). Ruby decides her party is the perfect occasion to sleep with Xavier. 6.30 Rough Guide To City Breaks (R,S). 11/15. In Barcelona, Julia Bradbury experiences life as a Catalonian, while Toby Amies heads to Polands cultural capital Krakow. 7.00 Five News At 7 (S). 7.30 The Great London Jump: Robbie Maddison (S). Stuntman and motocross star Robbie Maddison attempts a spectacular feat in the heart of London. His previous stunts include a motorcycle jump the length of an American football field and scaling the replica Arc de Triomphe in Las Vegas. Followed by Five News Update. 8.00 Fifth Gear (S). As the Government considers reducing the national speed limit from 60mph to 50mph on single carriageways, Tom Ford puts together a crash scenario to investigate whether the proposed change is the best way of increasing road safety. Elsewhere, Jason Plato pits the Renaultsport Clio 200 against the Renaultsport Clio 182 Cup. Followed by Five News At 9. 9.00 The Hotel Inspector (S). 2/8. Alex Polizzi tries to improve the fortunes of the Walpole Bay in Margate. The Edwardian hotel and museum was on the brink of closure until the Bishop family decided to rescue it. Alex informs Jane Bishop that she must give more responsibility to her son and daughter if she is to restore the establishments prospects. 10.00 The Juror (S) (1996). A mobster threatens to have a jurors son murdered if she fails to persuade the other members of the jury to return a verdict of not guilty in the trial of a Mafia kingpin. Thriller, starring Demi Moore, Alec Baldwin, Joseph Gordon-Levitt, James Gandolfini, Anne Heche, Lindsay Crouse and Matt Craven. See Film Choice 12.20 Americas Toughest Prisons (R,S). The understaffed maximum-security Wyoming State Penitentiary, where new guards often last as little as two weeks before the pressure forces them to quit. 1.25 NASCAR. The Lifelock.com 400. Highlights of the 19th round of the Sprint Cup Series at the Chicagoland Speedway, where Kyle Busch came out on top last year. 2.20 Race And Rally UK. 3.10 Motorsport Mundial. High-speed coverage. 3.35 Grand American Racing. 4.25 FIM Motocross. 5.10 Neighbours (R,S). 5.35 Home And Away (R,S). Robbie Maddison 7.30pm, The Great London Jump... Star Trek: Nemesis Film4, 6.50pm (2002) THIS one again? Its played virtually every month. Whats wrong with The Wrath Of Khan (1982) or The Undiscovered Country (1991)? Anyway, Jean Luc Picard has to fight a clone of his younger self who is threatening to destroy the Earth. But you probably know that already. Stars Patrick Stewart, above, Jonathan Frakes, Brent Spiner as Data, and Tom Hardy. Ali G Indahouse ITV1, 10.35pm (2002) BEFORE Sacha Baron Cohen was Kazakhstani or Austrian, he was a chav from Staines. In his first feature-length outing, Ali G is caught up in the Chancellors attempt to overthrow the Prime Minister, played by Michael Gambon, above with Baron Cohen. There are some laughs, but Ali G was better in smaller doses on a smaller screen. Alien Resurrection E4, 11.05pm (1997) DONT be fooled by the above photo of Sigourney Weaver and Winona Ryder. There isnt much tenderness in this final (hopefully) instalment of the Alien franchise. This time Ellen Ripley (Weaver) is a cloned alien-human hybrid -- but the aliens are still the same. French director Jean-Pierre Jeunet brings in his usual cast of Ron Perlman and Dominique Pinon. The Juror Five, 10pm (1996) A GOOD cast and a tried and tested plot -- court juror being pressured by outside influences -- cant save this film from being a stinker. Demi Moore, above, is the hapless juror who is being threatened by a menacing hitman known as The Teacher. Towards the end of the film the plot meanders and falters, as if the writers were putting the finishing touches to it as they went along. index.html2.html3.html4.html5.html6.html7.html8.html9.html10.html11.html12.html13.html14.html15.html16.html17.html18.html19.html20.html21.html22.html23.html24.html25.html26.html27.html28.html29.html30.html31.html32.html33.html34.html35.html36.html37.html38.html39.html